Love Stains

I’ve packed my belongings, went away
No home to call mine, and I still pray
My traces are left every time I move.
I thought you were my holy home
Like doll houses blown by wind
Disappearing not to be found.
My back, knees and soul hurt
Too much baggage to move
Alone, my stuff fell on the ground
Holding many bags, I tried gathering
them from the street and felt dead.
What’s left of my love
is like period blood stains
stone and pure red tears.
I stained my soul with my lies
Hope always feels like a postponed
need to take a piss
You hold it in as much as you can
Faking being comfortable
Until your bladder explodes.
Every organ inside me is stained
Betrayed by my own self
For believing in you.
Stay in your ugly fortress
Escape, and leave everything behind
Burn your old self to the ground
You are beyond repair
I don’t believe in you anymore



Nihon Ryouri ( Authentic Japanese Restaurant Makino in Egypt)

real Japanese food !
If you can’t afford traveling to Japan at the moment, make sure to treat yourself to one of the world’s most famous cuisines.
There is a wide variety of restaurants in Egypt that serve sushi and some Japanese food, however, Makino, is a truly authentic Japanese restaurant run by Japanese staff and chefs as well as a few Egyptians. They are located inside the Hilton Hotel on Mohamed Mazhar street. I made a reservation and once I arrived, I was greeted by a very friendly hostess who lead me to my table. The interior is simple, yet sophisticated with natural lights and an outdoor seating place which would definitely suit one of those summer nights. Once I entered, I felt like time has slowed down as the place is quiet with calming music in the background. I wished there would be more cultural aspects through paintings or decorations or even a small Japanese garden outdoors to make the place even more surreal. The hostess immediately brought me cold towels which was a kind gesture in such a hot weather. The menu has so much to offer, it includes sushi, sashimi, noodles, grilled dishes and so many other Japanese dishes. They also write on a notice board their daily specials and also offer a set menu where you can order a full meal. I ordered the full meal set (200 l.e) which included appetizers prepared by the chef in an open kitchen in front of you. It included spinaches in sesame sauce, deep fried sardines with Japanese vegetables and tuna sashimi with the chef’s special sauce. I think if Gordon Ramsey tasted those appetizers he would have definitely said it was made with so much finesse. The tuna literally melts in your mouth and there is so much flavor in the vegetables. Don’t expect any westernized versions of Japanese cuisine where they add cream cheese and mayonnaise on top of fish. Just imagine yourself in a Japanese village tasting their authentic food made with love and attention to every single detail. Next, I had miso soup, which was basically a piece out of heaven. I felt like the flavors are exploding in my mouth and the spring onions gave it a good lift in the palate. Then, there was the Shibaebe Kakiage which is a mix of tempura shrimps and onions fried till golden crisp perfection accompanied by a light sweet sauce.
It is worth mentioning that Makino is among a few places in Cairo that serve Sake which is a kind of Japanese alcohol made out of fermented rice. After that, the hostess who was dressed in a beautiful kimono, served me the main dish which consisted of a beautiful assortment of sushi as well as Kitsuna noodles. The sushi presentation was marvelous and made me truly feel like I am already in Japan. It consisted of California rolls, and other fish sushi . The most delicious one was the tuna sushi. The fish was so fresh and tasty. I was so full at this point, but I tried the noodles. The noodles itself is made out of green tea and the broth is made out of vegetables. It also includes fried tofu and some sea weed leaves. I didn’t like it so much as it lacked flavor unlike the miso soup. But, I was so contempt due to the excellent sushi. For desert, I had matcha green tea ice cream as well as sesame seeds ice cream. They were served in little portions, but were surreal and full of flavor. The matcha green tea ice cream certainly complemented the entire meal set .



Thoughts Worth Mentioning

When you’re sick, so dizzy you can’t even get out of bed, feelings of helplessness and loneliness just pour all over you submerging your head . It’s only natural, I suppose, to contemplate upon life in general with a hint of a pessimistic overview .

Being healthy is more important than anything else in the world.

She gently hands me the medicine and arranges flowers in my room, while checking on me every once in a while.

In such times, I’m once again reminded of how my mother is the only person willing to sacrifice her own peace of mind and time to take care of me and make sure I get better . We have our problems, conflicts and different perspectives , but I am always re-assured that her love for me is infinite and she’d always be there for me . She is the only person who can actually deal with my bad sides patiently, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that she accepts those sides. But she is there … Always there for me no matter what, even if we are both angry as hell and just shouting in the middle of a supposed conversation, she manages to cool down things.

She is the main reason I’m still here.
That said, everything I do is down right horrible. Feelings of guilt and sadness are just filling me up right now because I’d like to be true someday …. Not afraid and fully leading one life. Not having to create and invent …. Just there … Out there … Seen as a whole. Not needing or wanting, just being .

It’s a fact that I can’t and won’t be able to satisfy everyone in my life, including myself.

The months ahead will be the most difficult because I will start taking slow, but drastic actions while fully taking responsibility for the consequences.

I’d like to be one whole entity instead of scattered pieces .

It’s exhausting having to collect back those pieces.

Bored Till Death

Death is a beautiful woman
drenched in blue velvet
while smoking green
in the afternoon.

Death loves black cats
bare skin and constant
colorful melodies and
tunes .

Her red lipstick on the wall
Sweet traces of sweat and tears
Untouched sand and seashores
Red blood moon and a call.

Death is a tight palm tree skirt
And a vintage scarf over her neck
loud screams and several whispers
through the long morning hours.

Death is long lonely summer nights
powdery soft ivory kisses
infinite space within four walls
playful sea lions in the air.

Death is my boredom filling
my empty room and bed
writing on the wall:
”bored till death”
I might as well die

Death is not being
there together.

Copyright 2014

All rights reserved, Asmaa Lotfy

Red Sky

I don’t know about today
or tomorrow or
after tomorrow
Vagueness spreads over
meaningless calenders
and untouchable changing

We are only wasting time
floating over naked mattresses
painting the unknown
Embracing light and fearing
darkness as it takes me away.

I don’t care if I turn into ashes
tomorrow or disappear through
my sleep tonight.
I won’t mind dissolving through
air and a red sky.

Mud and dark fall scent
over repetitive morning coffee
and stale cigarettes with
old foolish spirits.

She writes out of boredom
out of erotic tendencies
slipping through her mind
like black silk undergarments
and gods kissing swiftly through
different dimensions and worlds.

She changes with different seasons
not knowing what to expect
losing and gaining silence
and in between:
she feels everything and she feels
losing some of her braincells
and hurting her ability to

Staying any longer
will only destroy than
Too much suffocation.

Running out of time.

Copyright 2014

All rights reserved, Asmaa Lotfy

More Than a Sponge Bob T-shirt

Saw him more often in the sun light
Got back to her anarchy in the cellophane
Covering their selves with screams and tunes.

Time only exists when they’re apart
Mazzy again and again and again
watching the truthful purple color
take it’s place gracefully upon her.

An offending delinquency seen by
Harmony and calmness floating
in space surrounding them.

It’s more than a Sponge Bob T-shirt
It’s everything

A heated stimulation of eternal minds

and hearts.

She breathes in tranquility
when there’s peace of mind.
Nothing is known about
tomorrow or after tomorrow.

It’s more than a Sponge Bob T-shirt
It’s everything

with a rabbit-like stone hidden closely

near her blue heart.
Together, colors will taste
as good as they ever been.